Lately, I haven’t really been all that compelled to write anything on the blog.
The summer was a lost summer and even though I had time off I don’t feel I made the proper use of it. Even now as I write this I had the last week off and I can’t say I really accomplished anything at all which is frustrating to say the least.
My days are occupied by cooking a ot of the time and just getting through a day which flies by way too fast at this point in life.
Oh, and I went for another medical test last week. This time it was an MRI which I managed to get through fairly well.
If you haven’t ever had any kind of MRI it’s really an experience to say the least. You lie down on this long flat pad and it gets lifted up and moves you into a tube. Once you’re in the tube and the best way I can describe this is for you to imagine a huge very thick donut with a person size hole in the middle. In this case the donut is solid material and the contents of the donut are magnets that spin around you.
It makes a ton of noise when they are doing the test. Lots of clacking while this is all going on and they give you headphones to drown out the noise and also for you to get instructions.
The first time I went for one of these was over twenty years ago. Before I went I was continually asked, ‘Are you claustrophobic?’ ‘Are you claustrophobic?’ ‘Are you claustrophobic?’
I had never known myself to be at all claustrophobic but this is one of those instances where people keep asking you about something you’ve never even thought about and if they hadn’t asked you, it likely would not have been an issue but in this case they asked and they asked and they asked and when they put me in the machine well the first thing was it was a tight fit in that tube. I mean to the point where as I went into the thing my arms were pressed to my sides.
Also, I just went in and then made the mistake of opening my eyes and seeing the top of the tube right there. It was a very, very confined space.
I immediately freaked out. I went back the next day after the doctor who had sent me for the MRI prescribed two valium. Once I had the valium? No problem.
Also?
VALIUM IS THE GREATEST THING EVER!!!!!
Seriously, I mean after I took the test and was on my way home I noticed just the difference in the way I felt, all the stress and anxiety I carry around and normally feel was entirely gone. It was simply amazing! This was me as a perfect person.
Sounds weird right?
If it was up to me? I’d be taking valium every day. I can see how people could get addicted to it. Although unfortunately it’s a drug that the more you take of it, the less effective it is and it’s very addictive from what I hear. In any event, valium has been the solution to the MRI experience as well as some other things.
The last time I went the guy played classic rock music which helped. This tech didn’t do that unfortunately but I was able to master my thinking during the test which helped using some visualization I hadn’t tried before and given that I had gotten only a single valium instead of two (which is really what I should get being a big boy) was necessary. Then there is also the sleep mask I wear now when doing these things so if I open my eyes it’s just black which strangely isn’t as anxiety ridden as seeing the narrowness of the tube.
So, I got that done. Then I did some spackling for my 88 year old surrogate parent which was my good deed. I had repainted her screen door recently so I’ve been trying to bank some good karma.
The rest of the time while I was off I just idled away the days. That’s not a good thing but it’s been an exhausting year.
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